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Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

Luxury Pussy? For sale on itunes?!

In Uncategorized on September 20, 2010 at 10:24 am

You know when you’re heading home on the tube slightly drunk and pissed up on booze and you don’t have anything to read so you reach for a discarded Times Education Suppliment? How much does that suck? Well, last week all my Victoria line carriage had to offer was some girly fashion mag called The Stylist and imagine my surprise when there was a whole article on cats wearing bling!

Bagheera

Bingley

Gypsy

Vladimir

Texas

Does it get more perfect than that? Luxury pussy cats?!
Which is a nice segway into my next bit of news; THE LUXURY POP EP is now available on itunes! Just click on the button below to preview and buy!

The

Hipster’s Revenge

In Uncategorized on September 15, 2010 at 9:52 pm

Unless you’ve had your head up your arse for the last few days, you’ve probably received an email entitled ‘This is hilarious!’ or ‘I thought you might like this!’ in your inbox. Imagine my slight disappointment when I opened said ‘hilarious’ link last week and was treated to this…

To quote my good friend Bruno, ‘I do think the bit at the end of Being a Dickhead’s Cool is actually quite good. The girl who’s a part time blogger and designs her own jewellery etc. This is genuinely funny and a decently written spoof, reflecting the way people who aspire to some kind of creative lifestyle try and make their boring lives seem more interesting mainly through self indulgent projects like a magazine about their balls..’

Yeah fair point. It’s well made and pretty slick I suppose. However….
In the October 2008 issue of Loaded, Nicholas Burns (star of Channel 4s Hoxton p*ss-take Nathan Barley), when asked if there would be a second series of the show, replied: “I don’t think so. If we’d done it a year ago, maybe, but now there are too many people in real life like that”. That was in 2008. The show first aired in 2005.

Nathan Barley 2005

Yes. 2005. Shall I say it again? Nathan Barley was shown in 2005.

For some reason, over the last few months, there’s been a noticable backlash against people who hang out in Hoxton, Shoreditch or London Fields (i.e. everybody living in London between the ages of 18-50). Heaven forbid that some people might get an interesting haircut or experiment with some f*cking colour in their wardrobe!

I think what irritates me about this kind of stuff is that it’s f*cking lazy. Taking the p*ss out of someone with a fixed gear bike who might use a mac laptop (I own neither but so f*cking what if I did?) is like shooting fish in a barrel. Go and stand on the corner of Hoxton Sq or Broadway Market and that’s the kind of person you’ll see. It’s been that way for ages. Is that news? It’s like walking into a Weatherspoons in Cardiff and being surprised that it’s full of alcoholics and people with learning difficulties.

Yum!

The other point is that this kind of internet sniping is anonymous. Any little f*cker can set up a blog and start attacking people. If you’re going to take the p*ss, at least do it with some pananche or else you’ll end up writing something snide like this…

What sad f*ck has the time to hang around the East End covertly taking photos of Hoxtonites?! Think of all the effort they’re going to. It seems to be of no artistic worth at all. Surely you could do something better with your time love? Maybe learn about the meaning of satire? I think most of those people featured look cool. So someone is wearing boating shoes without any socks on. Why are they the subject of such derision?! For f*cksake, it’s summer! And anyway, at least they’re trying. God loves a tryer! I would love to see what this blogger has in their wardrobe that makes them an expert on what looks stupid or not.

Hoxton Hate bloggers WISH they looked as cool as this

Perhaps I’m missing the point here. Maybe these people are just trying to point out that hipsters are pretentious arseholes. Fair enough, but there are pretentious arseholes everywhere, especially blogging on the internet. The fact they might shop in American Apparel is neither here nor there.

So, to all those with Douglas Bader hairdos, fixed wheel bikes, synths, frames with no lenses, iphones and sailor tattoos I say this; IGNORE THE HATERS! As Adam Ant once so eloquently put it, ‘Ridicule is nothing to be scared of..’

Slap That Bitch!

In Uncategorized on September 1, 2010 at 9:17 am

funny gifs - Just Say No to Nip
see more Señor Gif

Some Old Bullsh*t

In Uncategorized on August 27, 2010 at 2:20 pm

For some reason Blogger.com f*cked my sh*t up by moving it’s servers and putting my old link out of business. If you want to read all my HIGHLY amusing blogs from the past few years, click here!

If Chick Corea says it's ok...